Day 289 of San Diego

TOMORROW IS THE BEGINNING OF OCTOBER!!!!!!!

IN (almost) 31 MORE DAYS, IT'LL BE HALLOWEEN!!!!

What should I do this year? Should I continue last year's tradition of posting scary stories from Creepypasta? Or should I write my own scary stories and post them on my Figment account?

Hmm... Decisions, decisions.

Lately, I don't have any ideas for a story. I have my big project, yet I'm wanting to post stories online. And in order to do so, I must face the possible consequences of it being stolen. Therefore, I don't want to post anything serious.

The reason why I bring up not having any ideas for stories is because I want to try and accomplish writing a story each night (or each day). I don't have a stopping point. I just want to see how many stories I can write before becoming bored or overly exhausting my creativity meter.

Since I'm rejuvenating my happiness, I might as well bring back a hobby I enjoy.

School was okay today. I'm surprisingly tired of it... Everything seems to be moving TOO fast with the teachers noticing. And because they notice, they're dumping tons of crap on us in order to keep up with the schedule. I'm a little worried about my first major paper... I kind of don't have a subject for it yet... I thought I did until the teacher mentioned the subject has to be concrete, not abstract. Mine was pretty abstract... I couldn't connect to it personally.

Honestly, I just want to write stories... Can that be my job already?

Day 288 of San Diego

I'm renewed.

Last night, Mason and I discussed about what's been happening for the past month and a half. Because of my overwhelming, almost uncontrollable, depression, Mason and I were constantly bickering over little things. I was thinking about ending the relationship. I thought leaving Mason would resolve the hurt. I felt like I was the "bad guy." But Mason told me leaving each other over my depression would be silly. He said, "There isn't a "good guy" or a "bad guy" in a relationship. There's "Me" and there's "You."" He said he understood what I was dealing with. I mean, I've been telling him about every infection I would suddenly contract. We listened to each other. We suggested a few things. We empathized each other.

Finally, I had an epiphany.

I need to help myself.

I don't NEED help from other people. I sort of don't WANT help from anyone. I appreciate support. That's always welcome. But I know myself better than anybody else.

When I said to Mason, "I want to help myself," I felt weight lift off of my shoulders. It was as if my mind calmly cheered, "Yes... Believe in yourself!"

Tonight, I'm going to play Destiny with Mason. My goal is to ignore the negative assumptions that I'm a bad player or that Mason is "stealing my kills and XP," etc. I'm going to focus on the game - the story, the atmosphere, and the joy of being able to play with Mason.

My depression has done too much pushing. It's time to shove back.

Svan Rider

Centuries-old defensive towers loom over remote villages in the Svaneti region of Georgia’s Caucasus Mountains. Svans in the collection of villages that make up Ushguli—a World Heritage site—hold on to deep traditions. Horses still provide reliable transport throughout the largely roadless region. (By: Aaron Huey)

Day 287 of San Diego

I saved my grandpa's chest from being sold in the yard sale. However, it was bought by our neighbors. Once I realized how special the chest was, I wanted it back.

In the morning, I collected the money to give back to the neighbors. I told my parents I wanted to keep the chest in the family. Hell, it's my grandpa's chest before he joined the Army. It has some bumps and scrapes, but that doesn't bother me. I think it adds character. 

The neighbors understood why I wanted it back. They couldn't understand why my parents wanted it sold. And they sold it for $25. I'm pretty sure it's worth more than that... Yet I don't care if it's a million dollars. It's staying in the family.

I also kept an old medical kit that my grandpa probably used in the war. Maybe not... I don't know much of war items. It looks old. And military-like. It has crap in it. That looks old, too. 

The yard sale is on hold. We won't continue it until we find more things to sell. I may dig in my room to find unused coats or books to add to the next batch.

I'm definitely not selling or giving away any of my toys. <3

Day 286 of San Diego

I don't know where to begin...

I'm outrageously depressed...

Mason and I... I guess we're fine. But both of us individually are not doing well.

Our yard sale was successful for the first day.

That's about it...

I don't want to write anymore...

I just want to lay down and feel nothing.

Not sure what kind of picture is appropriate for this post.

Maybe something about war...

Day 285 of San Diego

I visited my doctor today. I had a pelvic exam. Turns out, I have another infection... It's... uhh... "downstairs"... if you catch my drift. Once more, my doctor prescribed me with an anecdote. It'll only last a week. For my antibiotics, I have - I think - a week and a half left. My body is already sick of waking up at midnight to pop a pill. Yet I won't complain! Annihilating my intestinal infection is more important. Solid sleep can wait.

School was cool. But the coolest part of the day was when I woke up.

No... I despise waking up at six. That wasn't the cool part.

The cool part was waking up to the thunderous sound of pouring rain. I thought I was listening to a giant fan; the kind they use in movies to create stormy weather. You know how you wake up and you're still somewhat asleep and you can't comprehend your surroundings and the sounds until several seconds later? That was me... Believing my parents planted a fan in my room and turned it on High for the Hell of it. Nice work, brain.

For school, I had a Math quiz. Yet I was able to get assistance from the teacher AND the students. It was a little fun, actually. I asked tons of questions to the peers sitting closest to me. We figured out problems our minds couldn't understand. We double checked our answers. I'm pretty positive I passed.

ENGL was decent. We wrote some more.We also discussed our first project.

Over the weekend, the folks and I are doing a yard sale. We are cleaning house! I designed a few signs to post around the neighborhood. I'm hoping we sell most of our crap. We don't need it anymore. We don't need it collecting dust. If it's slow, I'll play Destiny with Mason. He's a bit bummed that I don't want to play tonight... I'll try my hardest to make it up for him tomorrow or sometime during the weekend!

Call of the Wild

A lioness roars a warning to her cubs in Kenya’s Masai Mara National Reserve. “She was perched on a hill right on the side of the dirt road,” writes Your Shot member Linda Porter, who captured the picture on an evening game drive. On an opposite hill were three young male lions, which sometimes kill cubs. “Our guide knew this lioness had three young cubs that were were out of sight and hidden. We observed her for over an hour as she continued to call out to her cubs, warning them of the potential danger that lurked across the way. Unlike most of our children, these cubs were extremely obedient and remained hidden.”

Day 284 of San Diego

I missed the rain.

Every morning as I drive to school, rain is pouring. Usually around afternoon hours, the sun breaks from the clouds. But I'm excited for cold, blustery weather! Maybe not every day... Then I might become overly depressed. Yet if it SNOWED, it would be a whole other story. I'm mostly excited for snow. I hope our Christmas will be a very white and merry.

Today... I liked today. My intestines are acting more and more polite. Thank you, Life. I appreciate your generosity. Math was the most frustrating part about today. We were learning how to factor with exponents as fractions... Is that even legal?

ENGL was fun. We wrote a journal entry about expressing voices within art or writing.

I haven't spent time with Mason yet. He's still cleaning. I don't know if we'll be able to play Destiny tonight. I'm somewhat in favor of that... I'm tired of being frustrated over a video game... But it isn't Mason's fault. It's my fault for being insecure.

Long story short, I'm jealous Mason is better at playing video games than I am.

Anyway!

I'm going to stop here for tonight.

Day 283 of San Diego

I had to poop at school today... The horror of not knowing whether or not any of the other girls would hear me was intense. Miraculously, the girls were too busy flushing toilets, turning on the faucets, and drying their hands in a jet-drying thing... Whatever the Hell you want to call it...

I started my medication in the morning. My schedule is 6 AM, noon, 6 PM, and midnight. I must take a pill every six hours since the medication is strong. I also force myself to eat something once (or prior to) taking the pill. The pharmacist said I could become nauseated if I don't do so.

School was chill. I'm enjoying this first week. Everyone - especially the teachers - are kind and like assisting their students.

Mason and I are still going through difficulties...

I think I'll end it here. I might write more tomorrow if I'm in a better mood.

Take care!

Day 282 of San Diego

Second day of school. Wasn't bad. Again, my intestines were polite. However, I almost had to rush out of ENGL to use the bathroom because I couldn't tell whether or not my bowels really needed to release or it was only giving me a warning. Thankfully, it was only giving me a warning - a gentle one that didn't involve streaking in my underwear.

Math was fair. The teacher went over our homework with the class before handing out the next set of questions. Instead of trying to complete 75 questions, I only had to complete 54.

ENGL was cool. The class played an ice-breaker game. We counted off numbers until grouping with the people who had the same number. I was in a group with all men. Yet they were nice. And very intelligent. I was expecting them to act immature and obnoxious. I'm glad I was proven wrong.

When I arrived home, I finished homework before picking up my prescription at Safeway. The pharmacist claimed the medication was strong. The side effects could be nausea, diarrhea, or fatigue. I'm hoping I can operate a vehicle while taking the pills...

I'll continue to double up on my probiotic as I consume the new antibiotic. I don't want another episode of thinking I'm healthy again when suddenly the infection decides to come back.

I don't know if I mentioned in my last post, but I informed my professors that I'm struggling with an intestinal infection and will soon be taking prescription pills. They understood. They don't mind if I take a pill during class. They shared their empathy for me, too.

I'm a little eager for tomorrow. I want to see how my new antibiotics effect me. If I feel sleepy behind the wheel, I'll surely pull over and call my mom.

Hey! On a side note, remember the truck that was stuck in our ditch? Well, it was finally moved. My mom couldn't stand seeing the truck trapped on the side of our road. Yet around noon, a toe truck saved the day and released the truck from the ditch's clutches.

I am seriously curious of what happened. Tempted to ask. Would that be rude?

Blessed Beast

Traditions endure in the Svaneti region, high in Georgia’s Caucasus Mountains. Here, a bull with candles on its horns is blessed at a tenth-century church near the town of Mestia before being sacrificed for a February feast dating from pre-Christian times. (By: Aaron Huey)

Day 281 of San Diego

Long day. Long post. GO!

I woke up at six. But before I woke up, I was dreaming nonstop which had me tossing and turning. I was having dreams about being late to class or becoming lost within a building. Ironically, I did become lost trying to find my ENGL class yet I wasn't late for both classes. Another wonderful thing, besides not being late, my intestines were polite! I didn't have the urge to crap my pants until I had to drive home. But I waited until I arrived at home before using the restroom.

As I was saying, I woke up at six. I prepared my backpack, ate breakfast... all that jazz. I left the house by seven. The traffic wasn't too bad. I got to school within 30 minutes. I found a decent parking space. I waited in my car for another 25 minutes. Once time was up, I walked to my first class: Math. I'm sitting at a table with three other girls. I'm glad I didn't get stuck sitting with some guys... It seems some of the guys in my Math class are a little... well... fresh-out-of-high-school-ish. My Math teacher is nice so far. The guidelines are laid back. Homework doesn't have a due date, but it must be turned in before the final exam. For quizzes, I believe they are a group work activity. I can dig it! However, exams are individual.

My ENGL class sounds pleasing. I'm in an expository writing class. It's more of a creative non-fiction writing course. Thankfully, I won't be writing biographies on dead presidents... Again, I was grouped with three other girls. They seem... okay. I feel their kindness is sketchy... I feel they're the kind of girls that act like your friend, but talk crap about you behind your back. Just an assumption. Hoping it isn't true. Nonetheless, I'm pretty sure my assumption will guide me in the correct direction - not befriending them.

Once I was home, I had to take care of 75 Math homework problems. I finished them in three or so hours. Afterwards, mom and I did some errands.

We visited Safeway first to pick up my prescription.

Yea... About that...

I have to wait another day because the total cost was $1,000... But that was WITHOUT insurance. The pharmacist noticed our shocked expression and suggested she call our insurance to cover it. I told mom, "I really hope this $1,000 medication can cure my infection..."

Honestly, it sounds like it could cure anything for that amount of money.

When the pharmacist ended the phone call, she informed us that with insurance, we'll only pay $10.00 worth. Mom and I agreed that that price would suffice indefinitely. The lady said she'll have my prescription ready tomorrow around noon. I'll pick it up after school.

While at Safeway, I also purchased women's multivitamins. I'll take two of them a day to nutrient myself since, I'm guessing, my infection hasn't allowed much nutrition to suck up through my intestines. My Aunt Dotti thinks I'm losing weight. I think the same.

Next, mom and I visited Petco. I bought Indigo more crickets and other accessories to add to his cage. I'll furnish his cage tomorrow.

Lastly, mom bought some smelly stuff. She soaks cotton balls in it before throwing them in the vacuum cleaner. That way, while mom is vacuuming, it won't smell like animal fur.

For dinner, the folks and I had Spuds. As I ate, I corrected my homework.

After dinner, I cleaned the empty cricket cage prior to filling it with live crickets.

I told you! Seriously long day... Goddamn Mondays.

Oh... Yea... Here's a picture of a truck that's stuck in our ditch. We don't know what happened, but it's a truck used for capturing roof debris because our neighbor wanted a new roof. Last time I saw the truck, it was on the above street in our neighbors driveway. What a bunch of knuckleheads.

Day 280 of San Diego

SEAHAWKS!!!!

SEAHAWKS!!!!!

SEAHAWKS!!!!!!

Did anyone else watch that game? I thought the Broncos had it... The family and I stressed... We screamed; we insulted; we used every superstition to try and evade the Broncos victory. Suddenly, we were in a tie. Whoever grabbed a touchdown first during overtime would win the game.

WE DID IT!!!!

Seahawks finally pulled out the stick stuck up their asses and decided to throw the damn ball! Each time Wilson had Lynch run the ball near the end zone, we were unsuccessful of a touchdown. But once Wilson began throwing the ball, everything started to flow. My family and I were on the edge of our seats until Lynch made the last touchdown. Then, we were on our feet cheering at the top of our lungs.

Good job, Seahawks.

Broncos: So close, but no cigar.

Tomorrow I start school. I will also be able to pick up my antibiotics. Tonight, I'll hit the hay around 9:30 - 10:00. I need as much sleep as possible. It has been a while since I used my brain...

And because it's a new week, I'm going to try my best to write every day again. I'll most likely have much more to say since school is starting.

Soon, I'll search for a job. But I want to be 100% healthy before trying.

Wish me luck.

  

Day 278 of San Diego

It's confirmed.

I still have the intestinal infection.

My doctor prescribed more antibiotics. I drove to Safeway and asked if my antibiotics were stocked. The lady told me they wouldn't be available until Monday.

Guess what's happening on Monday?

First day of Fall quarter...

I'm not going to panic. I'm tired of panicking. At least I know what's wrong with me. That was my main goal. Now, I need to finish the antibiotics and hopefully move on as a healthier (and wiser) person.

Tonight, I'll play Destiny with Mason until we're exhausted. Or, until I'm exhausted... Over the weekend, I usually become groggy before Mason does. Over the weekdays, it's vice-verse. Soon, I will understand his struggles. I know once I'm as healthy as an ox, I'll apply for a job. And yes, I'll work while in school. But that's how I want it to be. I'll see what it's like. If I can't handle it, then I'll apply for a job in the summer time. No big deal!

Anyway, that's it for now. Take care!

Wishful Thinking

“The sky transformed itself into a splendid and surreal sea of lanterns carrying all kinds of wishes,” writes Your Shot member Sherry Zhao of the scene at the Yi Peng Lantern Festival in Chiang Mai, Thailand. Here, a couple makes a wish before releasing a lantern into the night sky. “This enchanted moment is truly embedded in my memory,” Zhao writes. “I’m glad I was fast enough to lie down on the ground and capture the serene moment between this young couple, who drew my attention with their sincere expressions before sending out the lantern, sending up hope.”

Day 277 of San Diego

I don't remember if I have ever 1) Written a post in the early morning and 2) Delayed on writing for five days.

I'm writing in the morning because I know once it becomes evening I won't have the determination to write a post. Since my life is a bit mellow, I can safely say today will be like the others - playing on IMVU, watching YouTube or the T.V... You know, that sort of stuff. The only change for my ordinary days is Mason and I playing Destiny together after he's done with work.

I guess I should recap what's been happening for the last few days:

Saturday:

Seahawks game! Disappointingly, Seahawks lost... But I figured it would be a tough game after watching the Chargers play against the Cardinals. Before the game, I watched the pregame show to see if they would give us a preview of Mason and his Marine friends practicing for the national anthem. They didn't. I wasn't too concerned. I told myself they'll broadcast the national anthem before kickoff. I mean, who would skip broadcasting the national anthem?

Our channel did...

I didn't see Mason or his Marine friends pull out the giant American flag on the field... We didn't hear the national anthem... My family was eager to see Mason, too. Yet it skipped the event and went straight to kickoff. I sent a text to Mason telling him I didn't see him pull out the flag. He was just as upset as I was.

But the mood switched when mail arrived. Mason told me a couple days earlier that he had purchased me something. I had an assumption of what it was since we were talking about it for a while. And sure enough... he bought me Destiny. I thanked him a hundred times over! I couldn't wait for us to play together. He picked up his copy after dinner at the store.

Sunday, Monday, Tuesday:

Mason and I played Destiny every day after his work schedule. We have a blast. It's such a neat game! Now I understand why it won tons of awards. I'm thinking after Mason and I beat the game together, I'll replay it to immerse myself into the story. Mason and I Skype while playing Destiny. We try our best to avoid talking while there's dialog or narration. Yet most of the time, we have something to say.

Wednesday:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO GRANDMA J AND TO MY DAD!!! We celebrated their birthdays at Azteca. Uncle Jay and Aunt Jill joined the celebration. We had a lot of fun. I ate as much as I could. For dessert, we had deep fried ice-cream. Yum! Although I knew my tummy wouldn't appreciate devouring dairy products, I didn't care at the time.

Today:

Now I do care...

My intestinal issues are continuing. Almost in full force. I've emailed my doctor. This morning, I called the clinic to ask if I could take a stool test without permission from my doctor. I guess I do need permission... If my doctor doesn't respond this week, I'll be doomed next week.

I start school on Monday.

Do you know how prepared I am?

I'm not!

I'm worried I won't be able to sit still and focus because of my tummy problems...

I'll definitely warn my teachers in case I can't make it to class one day. Or, for the fact that I may use the bathroom every thirty minutes.

Oh God... I hope each moment I use the bathroom, no one else is in there with me... What humiliation...

I'm going to go rest. I was considering taking a walk, but I'm unsure...

I don't want to walk around the neighborhood with pants full of fecal matter.

Frozen

Hunched like an animal in repose, a large piece of ice catches the light at Breidamerkursandur, a black-sand beach in southeastern Iceland. Just after sunrise, Your Shot member Felix Inden had left behind a portion of the beach crowded with photo tours. “I just wanted to be alone and look at those waves, patterns, and ice,” he writes. This particular piece caught his eye quickly as he walked down the beach. “Somehow I felt that we were friends and called him Luigi.”

Day 272 of San Diego

Yesterday, I was having a meltdown from abrupt watery diarrhea. It's the reason why I didn't write a post...

That sentence sounds hilarious to most. But for me, it was dreadful... I assumed my intestinal infection resumed in full force. Today, the diarrhea continued. Tonight, it has slowed dramatically. I am drinking water. I have been eating as much as I can. Enough to suck up the water trapped in my intestines. I informed my doctor's nurse of my sudden watery diarrhea. She said she'll tell my doctor as soon as possible.

Besides the diarrhea, my day was relaxing. I watched Matt and Woolie (a friend to Matt and Pat) play a game called Predator: Concrete Jungle. I don't think I'm entertained with the video game more than I am entertained by Matt and Woolie's humor. I'm glad they have humor in which I can relate to. While I was watching YouTube, I hung out on IMVU. Around the evening hours, I decided to play Minecraft. Minecraft had a HUGE update!!! There are underwater monuments and bunnies and different styles of doors, etc. I'm diggin' it.

But the thing I'm worried over is Microsoft buying Minecraft... I STRONGLY hope Microsoft doesn't pull a fast one on us Minecraft nerds and turns Minecraft into something us nerds didn't ask for. I believe if Microsoft did such a thing, they would lose money instead of gaining it.

Tomorrow's plans are simple: prepare for a Seahawks game. The Seahawks are playing against the San Diego Chargers. And guess who'll be a part of holding the giant flag in the middle of the stadium? Mason!

However, he doesn't seem extremely pumped on the situation. He told me he feels it's just another event that he's associated with.

If I were in his shoes, I would be ECSTATIC! I would be speechless... Being able to stand on a football field in front of thousands (plus the thousands watching the game on a T.V. or listening to it through the radio) of people before watching the game firsthand! He might even meet a few players. What an opportunity. What I would give to have such a privilege.

Hey, life... Throw me a freakin' bone.

Day 270 of San Diego

There isn't a feasible introduction to what happened last night around 10:30 PM. I guess I'll jump into the story then.

After Mason and I ended Skype to fall asleep, twenty minutes later I heard someone walking down our alleyway. Our alleyway is filled with gravel and isn't a type of street. It ends with other houses' backyards or carports. I was bothered by the notion of how come someone at such an hour would be out walking about. Angel was barking wildly. I sent a text to mom telling her I heard somebody in the alleyway. She checked downstairs in the front room. She didn't see anyone walking towards the road connected to the alleyway. She rushed upstairs and peered out of my bedroom window. In astonishment, she opened the window and shouted, "Can I help you?" I heard a young man's voice reply, "Oh [shoot]. You scared me." Mom claimed later he was snooping around my dad's immobile truck. She ran downstairs, asking me to follow her. I did. She gave me a phone and told me to stay inside. She said if anything were to happen, call 9-1-1 immediately. I agreed while watching my mom quickly walk outside with a flashlight to meet the stranger next to my dad's truck. However, he was gone by the time she was close enough to the truck. Later, mom said (as she walked back to the front door) she heard our neighbors backdoor close and people chattering. She also said she saw a man with a backpack talking with someone else near our neighbors house. She entered inside and told me to wake my dad. I did, telling him to stay quiet, but join mom and I downstairs in the front room. He dressed and joined us. Mom informed him of a man luring around his truck acting suspicious. Instantly, dad became enraged. He followed my mom outside - flashlight in hand - and began searching. When he walked inside to grab the X-Terra's keys to patrol the neighborhood, he started bitching about my mom not using her head and how we were searching for someone without his help.

Once my dad left to patrol the area, mom called the cops to state a report. She didn't ask for a patrol car (which I thought was dumb). She hung up the phone a few minutes after my dad came back from patrolling. Only later did he mention he saw a group of kids sitting at the edge of a street. My mom complained to him over why he didn't tell us at the moment of his arrival. He said he didn't think he needed to announce anything because he guessed the kids were our neighbors.

The whole event agitated each of us. We were tired and afraid. We were also annoyed that we didn't catch the guy who could have broken into my dad's truck. Finally, when we stopped the search, my dad ceased my mom and I to criticize... First, he blamed me for sending a text to mom about hearing someone walking down our alleyway instead of presenting it to them by walking into their room. Secondly, he blamed my mom for dealing with the situation without my father awake during the time my mom and I realized someone was snooping around. Lastly, he boasted about how he could have solved the problem himself if only we woke him up sooner rather than later. I didn't say a word... My mom hopelessly agreed that she was in the fault.

My dad was acting absurd. Not once did he ask if each of us were alright. Not once did he thank us for stepping up our game in making sure nobody robbed us. Not once did he tell me, "Good job at hearing someone walking down our alleyway!" Not once did he tell my mom, "Good job at trying to search for the suspect!" The only living thing he applauded to was our dog, Angel. I'm not jealous because Angel received more gratitude than my dad's human family. I'm actually surprised he said ANYTHING to Angel.

You know what, I'm glad he told Angel "Good dog." She deserves more compliments from him. He doesn't give enough - to anyone, really.

That night, I could hardly fall asleep... I couldn't stop thinking about my dad not appreciating what I did. I practically SAVED his stupid truck from being stolen or from any parts of it being stolen. I was also worried that the man may come back... What if he had brought friends? What if he had brought a weapon?

In all honesty, both of my parents were idiots. They looked for a man they didn't know whether or not could have had a weapon on him. We should have left it to the cops.

I'm glad I had therapy today... I was able to release some unwanted tension between last night and what had been happening to my mentality during my streak of infections. My therapist really guided me in the right, healthier direction. Thanks, Lori.

What's there more to say?

Savoring Chance

Terraced salt pans dip into the Sacred Valley north of Cusco, Peru. Your Shot member Cedric Favero wanted to give an idea of the dimension of the site, called the Salinas de Maras. “The few workers on-site were too far away or kneeling,” he writes. “I moved around looking for someone and found this worker walking on the edges of the ponds. I waited until he reached this larger pond, where his silhouette would be detached from the background.”

Day 269 of San Diego

WELL!

Mason's month has certainly bloomed while mine has perished. I am hopelessly jealous over Mason's good fortune. He's been hanging out with his friends, progressively gaining ranks, having fun with his shop members, and will have the privilege of holding the ginormous American flag at the Seahawks vs. Chargers football game on the 14th.

Can God send me a sign that I have been a sinful child which has given me my misfortune? I'm confused...

I understand Mason is a great person. Hell, never take away his good fortune. But... aren't I just as great?

I am recovering from two infections. I suppose one could say that's impressive. Yet I'm bothered by the query of wondering what I had wronged. There's a reason for everything, right? A cause and an effect. It's a part of life! That's how the world keeps spinning!

Like I said, I'm hopelessly jealous over Mason's good fortune. Maybe that is why I was punished with infections? Similar to a plague?

Am I taking this too far?

On the Line

An underwater paradise in the remote Pacific Ocean that includes the sea around the southern Line Islands (Caroline Island is seen here) will be protected—thanks in part to National Geographic’s Pristine Seas project. Led by Explorer-in-Residence Enric Sala, the project is an ongoing effort to document and conserve what’s left of the planet’s least spoiled marine environments. (By: Brian Skerry)

Day 268 of San Diego

I blame my depression for not writing yesterday's post.

I guess I should explain myself...

Mason and I have been going through some struggles ever since I became sick. My mental health had plummeted with my physical health. Therefore, I was more sensitive towards EVERYTHING. Especially during my menstruation.

I contacted my therapist a few days ago. We scheduled an appointment for Thursday afternoon. I'm praying my mental health will adhere to normalcy afterwards.

If you were curious on my progress of contacting Markiplier, he still hasn't replied. Which... honestly... doesn't bother me as much as I thought it would have. Maybe in the next couple of weeks - if he doesn't reply - I'll feel the pain. Haha.

To detract from the subject about Markiplier, I have some happy news:

I'M NOT ON MY ANTIBIOTICS ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!

Let's all hope to the gods we pray to that I don't have to take MORE antibiotics for whatever reason. I'm truly sick of it.

Big and Little Dipper

Fortunately for Your Shot member Marco Mattiussi, the bears on Russia’s Kamchatka Peninsula were busy eating salmon during the week he spent in a small wooden house in the wilderness frontier. “You had to be very careful,” he writes. “It’s a dangerous place to meet a grizzly because they’re not used to humans.”

To get this shot, Mattiussi spent several hours lying on the shore of Kurile Lake during the ascent of salmon. “The little bear seemed to enjoy holding its head under the water. Its mother was very protective. She didn’t lose sight of her cub for even a second.”

Day 266 of San Diego

I'm watching Captain Phillips tonight. I haven't seen it yet. I'm betting it's an excellent movie. The only problem I'm having is reading the subtitles... I'm farther from the T.V. without wearing my glasses. Why are subtitles sometimes dreadfully small? Is it because the director or producer or whoever makes the decisions thinks it looks better on the screen?

Besides my slight frustration, my day was fine! I let Indigo soak up some sun outside in his new cage. His temperature gauge said it was 120 degrees... Yikes... Hopefully I didn't overcook him... Tomorrow, the folks and I will apply Indigo's lights in the area where his new cage stands.

Not much to say. You guys would know when Markiplier replies to me. The whole post might be written in CAPS.

I'm keeping confident!

Day 265 of San Diego

My highlight of the day was writing to Markiplier.

I found his email through Reddit. For months, I've been wanting to contact him. I didn't want to use Facebook or comment on one of his videos. I wanted the email to be goodhearted without worrying a stranger may respond rudely.

I don't know if Markiplier will reply. I don't even know if I found HIS email. For all I know, I could have sent a message to a super fan who craves attention. If it were Markiplier's legit email, I'm guessing he receives an endless amount of emails. I'm not sure if he'll recognize mine.

I did tell him of my blog. Maybe he'll check it once or twice? Maybe he'll even follow?

I'll continue to hope.

I've been doing too less of that.

This is what I sent him:

Dear Markiplier,

I don't know what to write... I'm in shock! Although I'm typing to you, I feel as if you're standing in front of me, waiting for me to say something - anything. I have the "fan girl jitters," if you would like to call it. I've wanted to contact you for a while, but I never knew how until I did some research. Gee, isn't the internet useful? Ha-Ha.

In seriousness, let us take a moment and thank the internet for what it has provided. You're able to live a dream of playing video games while recording yourself to entertain fans such as myself. And I'm able to watch you play video games while laughing with you or being startled from a scare with you; you and your fans are connected. I'm sure you understand how much love is given to you by every subscribe and every email and every comment... Isn't it wonderful? It's wonderful because of what one person can do to millions of people. If a fan is having a dreadful day and hopes for a refresher, they'll think of you. If a fan is having a great day yet wants to be amused, they'll think of you.

I'm proud of you, Mark. You're such a magnificent person who cares for others whom you haven't even met. You've brightened my most depressing hours. You've inspired my most inner imagination and desires. You're always there when I need a friend.

My boyfriend and I have followed you for many years. I introduced him to you. He and I have watched your videos ever since.

(If you would like to follow me, I have a Blogger: www.amarinesgirlfriendsdiary.blogspot.com)

Please continue doing what you do best. Everyone - including my boyfriend and I - will appreciate it.

I hope sometime in the future, we'll have the privilege of meeting you. That is our dream.

Infinite love,

- Payton

Day 264 of San Diego

By now, I'm positive you guys know that if I don't write for a few days, something is the matter.

Something is the matter.

My depression and my urine.

My depression doesn't have a limit. I thought my depression couldn't go any farther. But it's leaving me feeling utterly alone and worried for my own health. I understand worrying won't help my health, yet it seems to be the only thing I can do to survive. I can't act ignorant. If I fear something is wrong, I must tell my mom and email my doctor. I'm not ready for another infection...

My urine has suddenly become dark. Mom researched my antibiotic and it apparently can turn my urine a dark yellow. But my urine didn't turn dark until yesterday. I'm almost finished with my current antibiotics. Mom and I are assuming the infection in my intestines has ceased. We're wondering if the antibiotics aren't needed anymore and are now effecting my urine.

Yes, I emailed my doctor, asking for permission to stop taking my antibiotics. And yes, I'm drinking tons of water. I drank half a gallon today. That's why I'm concerned of why my urine is abruptly dark yellow.

In other news, I bought Indigo a taller cage. It looks terribly bare! I'll need to purchase more sticks and foliage for him. I also need to purchase him grass-resembling carpet for the bottom of his cage. I don't like having his cage's bottom bare as well. Hopefully I won't need to purchase him another cage. I'm sure a full-grown chameleon can fit in the one I bought today.

I hope he's happy. <3 More space to grow and climb!

Before I end the post, I want to congratulate our Seahawks for a tremendous win yesterday. Great job, guys! Keep it up!

Day 261 of San Diego

Hi, guys!

Not much to say.

But I decided to write a post anyway to let you guys know I'm doing okay. 

Today was very laid back. A little TOO laid back. My body is telling me to move more than shifting in my seat. 

Tomorrow, while Mason's at work, I'll walk for thirty minutes on the treadmill. If I were healthier, I would walk outside. I miss taking walks...

I'll also be working on the bracelets I said I would work on today...

I know. I suck.

Well, that's all I have to tell!! I'll write tomorrow!! 

Now... Back to BBC America.

Day 260 of San Diego

You know, today was easygoing. The only part that was a little frustrating was establishing job applications and referees. 

That's right! I'm about to apply for a job! My first job!!

I'm excited. But I'm nervous, too. I don't know what I'm going to wear, how I'll fix my hair, what I'll say, or if I'm going to act like a shy schoolgirl. I want my first impression to be clean! I want the managers (or whoever I speak to) to like me - on the spot! I'll probably practice in front of the mirror beforehand. 

However... I don't know what they'll ask...

In the meantime, I'll continue to heal myself. I think my period is kicking my ass more than my poop problem. 

Actually, I prefer it that way. 

Tomorrow, I'll be looping some Seahawks colored rubber band bracelets for Thursday's game. I need ten or more. I'll make it twenty.