Day 75 of Boot Camp

It was nice to sleep in another hour. My dreaming habits are, once more, destroying my rest... I wonder why I'm dreaming so much again? Because I'm stressed??? I tend to daydream when I'm stressed; releasing good vibes to help my brain calm down. I guess that's what my chemicals try to do while I'm SLEEPING.

Well it DOESN'T WORK. I toss and turn and find myself in strange positions...

Today was okay... I had to take an Italian test. At first I thought I was late because, as I sat in my car, I was reading over old texts I saved from Mason and I. And you know how if you take a screen shot on your iPhone or smart phone it also takes a picture of the time and everything??? Well... I thought the actual time was the time on the snap shot. It said "11:24 AM". My class starts at 11:20. I PANICKED like NO OTHER! I cursed like a sailor while jumping out of my car, grabbing my backpack, almost forgetting to lock my car (but did) and ran half way to my lezione. I am SO out of shape, bros. I was huffing and puffing...

Once in the classroom, I noticed only one other guy was there; Johnathan. I was confused... The class pretty much started 6 minutes ago... Why wasn't anyone around??? I told this to John and he stared at me as if I were nuts. I checked my phone and I BELIEVED I was nuts!! My phone now said it was only 11:17 AM! How could this be?!

Finally, I figured it out... I looked at the time that was on the text message instead of the literal time on my phone. I felt so lame... Haha.

At least I got some well-needed exercise!

And about the test??? Oh man... I don't know... I think I escaped with a C-. I honestly don't think I did very good... And if that's the case, I could be screwed for the final... Man, this college stuff is no joke... I should start learning how to NOT be a procrastinator!

... But I'll do that later... ;)

In the morning time, as I was driving to the highway, I was wondering if I'd see that coyote again!! I didn't... It was so neat though to finally see one in our neighborhood! Everyone else has been seeing him!! Then it was my turn.

While driving home, I remembered the child book I had written in my senior year class "Creative Writing". We donated our books (that we wrote and illustrated ourselves) to Children's Hospital. I, intelligently, saved my book on the computer (photocopier!). However, the color is a bit dim...

As I was saying, this book I created was named, "The Coyote and The Crow." I got inspired to write this story based on the fact that, while my father was outside moseying about, a coyote ran down our hill with an angry crow chasing him! My dad was STUNNED and yelled to the neighbor, "Did you see THAT?!" The neighbor agreed and he soon walked inside, stating he saw a coyote being pecked at by a crow. That day the class was actually assigned the child's book project. At first I was going to do a silly story about ninjas. Yet I didn't think I could pull it off. I had no plot... Only the idea of ninjas and the story being a bit of a comedy.

Finally, my mind said, "You know... You could pull off a great 'Native American like' story. You're pretty spiritual." I pondered and pondered until answering back, "Yea! And I'll name it 'The Coyote and The Crow'!"

I wish I could post my story online for all of your lovely readers and visitors to see. But I DON'T want it to be stolen. :( But I can tell you - it's an AWESOME 28 pages.

In other news... I'm sort of becoming the "director" of my group for the Italian script project. It's like hardly anyone in my group wants to partake!! Yet I don't want to truly TAKE OVER!!! So, I'm going with the flow. Though we're hanging off of the edge (the due date is right around the corner), I believe we can still pull it off if I keep going with the flow.

Man, this stress isn't doing me any good... I have double layers of stress. Layers upon layers!! No buono! I really miss Mason... I hope for that call VERY soon... I hope his teammates aren't making it hard for them so they won't be able to make that important phone call yet we won't know until it happens... Or DOESN'T.

I guess I could put this in a positive manner: He is kicking butt. He is being the Marine he always wanted to be and I wish him luck on HIS finals. Maybe I should be GRATEFUL that I have MY kind of finals since his are WAY out of line... For me, that is.

I'm betting big bucks he'll do MORE than just great. He'll do absolutely incredible. He's determined enough.

Day 74 of Boot Camp

Good News:
- Not needing to go to math anymore until the final
- Got mail from Mason
- Dermatologist says my psoriasis isn't half bad
- Saw a coyote while driving to the highway this morning
- Just came home from grandparents house stuffed
Bad News:
- Mason wants to go to OR after the zii are home
- Crazy dreams
- Stressed

This morning, I finally witnessed a coyote sighting! He was crossing the street as I drove to the stop-light leading to the highway. I couldn't tell what it was at first - maybe a stray dog - but as I got closer, I noticed the color and how he pranced. It was awesome.

In school, my math teacher pulled me aside during class and whispered to me, "You don't need to come to class anymore until the final on Dec/5th. You can stay home and study. You've come here each day. I'm only letting certain people have this privilege." I thanked her VERY much.

After school, I went to my dermatologist, Amy, and she gave me a quick 20 minute check-up. She said my haircut was cute prior to looking at my scalp. She noticed that my flaky patches are beginning to seem like psoriasis and not the other scientific-named skin disorder. She told me to keep up on the medicine if I'm looking for a nice, healthy scalp. So far, nothing too shabby.

Mom grabbed the mail today. She handed me a letter from May May (possibly the LAST letter I'll ever get now) and I read it, hoping for some exciting news. Well, I mean, it was great to hear from him, but I'm thinking about giving him the advice of suggesting to head down to OR before the zii get back. I really, really, REALLY want some quality time with him. A girl needs her affection. Nonetheless, I won't nag. I'll only bring it up and see what he says. All in all, I want HIM to be the happiest; no stress, no pressure - only a good time until he has to depart again.

My folks are at a running event. However, they aren't running. They're BOWLING. I wanted to kind of go; I enjoy bowling. Yet it's a 21 and over thing... Really? "When you become 18, you get to do anything since you'll be an adult!"

Please... Biggest lie in the BOOKS.

So, instead of moping at home, I went to grandma and grandpa's house. They cooked steak, sweet potatoes, shrimp, and corn on the cob. Yum!! Free food!

Don't you just wish you could have grandma's forever??? They cook the BEST stuff! I wish we had those contraptions that make you hyper-sleep. Let them live for ETERNITY - let them share their goodness with the generations to come!

Too creepy?

Anyway... Now for some BAD news.

I already told you about Mason's dealio. You already sort of know about me being stressed because finals are right around the corner. I guess I'll tell you the interesting dreams I've been having. I'll start with the one I had last night. This one will be quick.

KILLER PAIN AND A KILLER:

I don't know how this happened, but I accidentally broke my left Radius bone. It was SICKENING! At least I couldn't feel the pain. I probably would have been crying... It was so bad, that the damn thing hadn't pierced the skin yet. But if I would have kept messing with it, it could have. I would play with it by trying to push it back in its place. However, all it would do is SPRING back in its horrible position.

After that puzzling moment, I came across a newspaper ad in this shop we were mingling about in. Suddenly, I read a part that sent me spiraling...

For some strange reason, in this dream, I thought Daniel had committed suicide. I guess it's because I haven't seen him in so long and that's one of my fears; him dying unnaturally. Well, this article was brutal. It was about him doing something even more haunting than JUST molesting a young girl...

He raped one of my friends...

Then KILLED her...

I saw it before my eyes; like a vision! He was chasing my friend around her house, trying to snatch her up but she was too fast. Until!!

The dream ended - just like that.

Unbelievable, right? Now I'm starting to think of Daniel as a murderer. Why, brain? Why???

Here's my second dream. Again, this one will be quick.

Y R U HERE?!:

This one I liked the most because Johnny Depp appeared in it. However, I was a little agitated that he was in my dream... Honestly, I have no true answer for that... But, my conscience Me was pissed off because I couldn't understand why he'd keep showing up in my dreams! I haven't had a dream about him in a LONG time! Why was I, out of the blue, POed that I get to SEE him finally??? I don't know... But as I was saying...

When he was close enough, I grabbed him by the collar and shoved him up against a wall. Sadly, nothing romantic happened... I was too angry, I suppose...

Anyway, I kept a hold of him. I looked at him strictly and snapped, "Why are you in this dream??? Why are you HERE?" He wouldn't answer back. Or, if he did, I forgot what he stated. Nevertheless, the strangest thing about this dream was that I knew it was a DREAM. I knew it wasn't reality where most of my dreams lately have been feeling REALISTIC.

I think I even asked him if we were going to meet each other in real life and this was his way of "warning" me.

Jeez... if we met... my life would be so complete, it'd get hysterical. I'm serious. I'd be an embarrassment to nature. I'd try not to be, but you know... stuff happens. I'd only be me. That's what counts, right?

Soooo... Yea! That's my day. I created my new blog. I'll be posting my "fashionable options" soon. Other than that... Cool beans.

TTFN.

Day 73 of Boot Camp

Howdy, all. I have a bit of a headache at the moment so I'm going to get this post done and over with.

Today was a long and exciting day!! Before I was even in class, the excitement POPPED in front of me! I was entertained by this random dude (or dudette) that decided to be CRAZY brave and skid his car through the pine-needle-filled parking lot. Since there are barely any cars where I park, he had plenty enough room to do his little stunts. What he would do is he would drive juuuust fast enough until BRAKING quick enough, having his car spin 180 degrees. The first time, I kind of watched and gave him a look like, "Yea, yea. Whatever... show off." He was alone (I think) and kept looking over at me with a grin on his face to see if I were watching. Well, I was. I tried to be sneaky about it yet I highly doubt it... I wanted to see him do it again!!! It was entertainment!! I was supposed to be studying (math...) but I was having too much fun watching this goofball do his tricks. I tried capturing it on film yet he was too spontaneous. The second time he did it, I laughed. I looked at him and began ROLLING. He was laughing his head off, also! It was great!!! What an awesome morning!

However, the only negative thing about it was that I learned I have to put fractions in my math final... I guess I didn't finish a chapter like I thought I did. If I didn't put in the fractions, I would only have 5 chapters on my final. That isn't acceptable. I have to have 6 chapters!! Boo!! I'm a HORSE person! I don't abide by the rules!! ... Sometimes. ;)

Ah well... I chose the easiest way of dealing with fractions; adding and subtracting.

Did I share with you about the Horse people and the Cow people story??? Daniele told me this: Horses are free-willing spirits that enjoy wandering, adventuring, and trying out new things because... well... that's just who they are! Yet Cow people like to mingle with the heard, stay the same as everyone else; not like a horse. Sometimes cows look at horses and say, "Why are you so energetic??? You're similar to myself. Why don't you start acting like it???" And when Horse people begin to act like Cow people, they want to go NUTS!! Horse people hate having to be something they are not. Cows just don't care! They stick to the laws since that is how their ancestors were and because of their ancestors ancestors, etc. I'm a Horse person - not only because I ADORE horses, but also because I don't like roaming with the heard! I like to be individual. I want to run FREE! I want to do it soon! Are you a Horse person? Or a Cow person??? Don't worry; as Daniele says, there is no right or wrong. Only our opinions.

Anyway, Italian was dandy except for Ray being a butthead. Blargh... High schoolers...

After school, I bonded with Alex. He went to a 3 hour long concert last night and was completely exhausted. His last class canceled luckily, he asked if I could take him home, and I did - with hardly any gas in the car. Thankfully, we got to his place before my vehicle even THOUGHT about breaking down. Nevertheless, Enrico made it safe and sound to a gas station.

The Little Toyota That Could. :)

I had therapy today. I got some feelings out. Lately, during therapy, I wouldn't even really talk about serious things. I'd just... begin JABBERING as if Lori is a friend of mine who I haven't seen in a year or two. Yet I see her every other week! It's funny! I love Lori. I, at least, consider her a friend. I wonder if she considers me a friend too? I don't know. Either way, that's okay. She's nice to me, which is all that matters.

When therapy was done, I texted Alex and let him know I was now able to go with him to Goodwill Outlet. He wanted me to go with him right after school however I told him I had therapy but we'd do it afterwards. I got to his house, parked my car, jumped into his and we went on our way. It was lovely to bond with Alex!!! We've never truly done it before. I mean, maybe a tad when Mason or Mary (his girlfriend) was around but we've never totally took out the time to bond with each other. We've pretty much known each other since 3rd grade. It's about time we hung out!!! Haha :P

The Outlet was interesting. I've never honestly SHOPPED at a Goodwill or... something similar. I'd have this type of PHOBIA about it; everyone touching everything and the fact that someone else wore this item, etc. It bugged me. But today, I kind of appreciated it. In this outlet, you paid by the pound. I got three items that probably would have cost $20 for only $1.10. What in the hay stack, right?! I was like, "OH MY WHAT?!" Alex paid for our stuff and as he waited for it to process, I handed him the $1.10 :D

Prior to going home, I was starving. So we hit up McDonalds near my house. When we were done there, we went back to his place. He parked his car, revved the engine (because, apparently, he never did that with his car before and decided to try), until I got out to start my car and throw my crap in the back seat. I hugged him, got in my car, revved MY engine (so he revved HIS engine back!) before I took off with two honks saying, "Goodbye and thank you for an awesome day."

Once home (alone...), I turned on the TV and there was "The Birdcage"! It was completely ironic because at the Outlet, I saw a floral shirt and joked with Alex stating, "God, this shirt looks like what Robin Williams would wear in The Birdcage!" And once I saw Robin in his floral shirt, I snapped a photo and sent it to Alex. We thought it was pretty hilarious.

GREAT day! Man... "What else is possible?"

P.S: Might make another blog. I'm not on IMVU that much anymore (Yay!) however, instead of contributing it in a sort of "mean" way, I'll be making OUTFITS and posting them for people to get an idea of what they might buy when joining or wanting a new fashion! I love creating outfits. I love sharing - let's make something that most people see as "negative" into a "positive".

Sunrise, Saxony

Sunrise from the Bastei. It was the first sunny day in our country this year. The Bastei is a rock in our sandstone mountains in Saxony, Germany.

Day 72 of Boot Camp

"How can things get better than this?"

Todays morning traffic wasn't as bad as yesterdays; I was able to get from lane to lane. When I was at school, I noticed a strange feller exiting out of his van. Did he live in it? I'm not sure. But I guess this guy thought it was necessary to hold mouth wash behind his driver-side seat. He cleaned his mouth, sang some lyrics, and went on his way. It was difficult NOT to watch...

During math, I copied a few notes from Chapter 1. I SHOULD photocopy them however, I feel as if I write them down, they'll be recorded nicely in my memory compartment! If I'm still writing notes passed this week, THEN I'll think about using the photocopier.

In Italian, a young man named Omar walked up to me, expressing how lovely my presentation was yesterday. He's Colombian; from Columbia. Looks to be around his almost-30's. Nice guy. I think I'm making another friendship? We talked for a little while until he sat in his seat. It was neat :)

But what ISN'T neat is dealing with the high school students in that class. There's Jodi, Dorrien, Ray and... I believe that is it. Dorrien's okay, I suppose, Jodi seems like a nervous wreck waiting to happen, yet Ray is a BIT of a punk. While one of the presenters was presenting, she began cracking her knuckles. Our teacher FLIPPED out and said, "Please! Don't do that!" Everyone laughed, as she did too, but RAY decided to be "funny" also and crack HIS knuckles.

Once a punk, ALWAYS a punk.

He's a grammar Nazi too. If you say something that isn't properly used, he'll correct you in a snap. It's obnoxious...

After school was the best portion of the day. I went to get a facial and some relaxing time with my mom's friend, Daniele. She's a sweet lady; about the same age as mom. She's highly spiritual and MAGICAL. I swear. She's got some potency up her sleeves!

I'm glad she gave my body a nice, soothing massage. It needed it. I needed it! MY BRAIN NEEDED IT! Shoot, as I drove passed Lincoln Park (she lives right across from it), I began tearing up. It was hard not to cry!! I missed going there every other weekend with Mason. Now that Mason is gone, I thought I shouldn't be visiting it since I would be alone and I might conjure up some memories which would make me tear up even more.

Yet, like I said before, Daniele and her magical potency produced some stuff in which allowed me to let go of some things; mostly from my past. I cried. I felt like a total pussy! I kept saying, "I'm sorry." but I really didn't have anything to be sorry about. I thought I was sorry for crying in front of her; as if I needed to be tough around her or something.

She told me, "Don't you wish there was another way of saying Sorry? Sorry is so over-used and vague for it's meaning. And not all the time do we need to be sorry!"

It's true. Sorry is vague! I want another word to use. Or a phrase. Or... something! I say sorry for everything... I say "I'm sorry" when somebody tells me they're having a bad day!! I suck up everyone's feelings and make them mine. I would believe that, by doing so, it would make THEM feel better. Nevertheless, it's the total opposite.

That's another thing we did today; released, or, "returned to sender" the feelings that weren't even mine. It had me let go, I felt a bit lighter each time; it was nice.

You know the saying I used in the beginning of this post? Daniele told me that saying. It opens up the universe and your mind to give you the opportunity in enveloping positive things. Even when you had a crappy occurance one day, you can say, "How can things get better than this?" or "What else is possible?" It sounds bizzare, I know, but it works. You can even say it when you're having a GREAT day! Just allows the universe to gift you with more positive outcomes.

And about the feelings that aren't yours? Well, before you accept a negative feeling, first ask yourself, "Is this feeling my own or someone/something elses?" and "Whom does it belong to?" If it does belong to somebody/something else, you say, "Return to Sender" multiple times. It'll help you get that unwanted monkey off of your back.

It was awesome to see Daniele again. She does wonders. <3

After the appointment, I thought about going home. Then, I looked across the street and saw Lincoln Park. I pondered, and pondered, and pondered some more until I made up my mind!!

That park longed for me. I longed for it. It needed my presence there. I needed its presence back. I figured, "Well, I'm relaxed now. I got stuff off of my chest; I think I'm able to go." and I did. Barely anyone was there. It was beautiful.

I thought up a few sayings Mason and I would probably say to one another while crossing this area in the woods or walking down this path that would head into a familiar direction. Other moments, I would "talk to Mason" through my mind. I'd say, "Remember this place, Mason?" "Remember when we did this here, Mason?" "I missed it here, Mason." "God, I love it here, Mason. I wish you were with me. Hopefully you can feel this vibe right now."

I wrote a simple poem about my experience there today:

“It’s Been a While”

 

It has been a while since I’ve walked down Your curvy paths,

Since I’ve sat on Your worn benches,

Since I’ve thrown Your sandy rocks.

It has been a while since I’ve seen Your washing waves,

Since I’ve seen Your swaying brush,

Since I’ve seen Your daunting trees.

It has been a while since I’ve explored Your trails,

Since I’ve played with Your twigs,

Since I’ve danced in Your secret places.

It has been a while since I’ve ran through Your sand,

Since I’ve lied in Your grass,

Since I’ve acknowledged Your visitors.

It has been a while since I’ve parked in Your lots,

Since I’ve struggled up Your hills,

Since I’ve breathed in Your air.

It has been a while since I’ve shivered from Your breezes,

Since I’ve gazed at Your sunsets,

Since I’ve photographed Your best “sides”.

It has been a while since I’ve shared Your joy with others,

Since I’ve admired Your beauty,

Since I’ve been inspired by Your tranquility.

It has been a while since I’ve glimpsed at Your sailing ferries,

Since I’ve heard blissful laughter from Your toys,

Since I’ve watched Your fields being used for ballgames.

It has been a while since I’ve made memories There,

Since I’ve been able to care,

Since I’ve been able to bare,

Once again.

Though my tangible shadow is unavailable,

I shall not leave You either,

I shall be with You – be with me.

He’ll be home, You best believe it,

We’ll visit You like we did before,

It’ll be like I never left You – never left me.

It has been a while since You’ve made me happy,

Made me smile,

Made me giggle.

It has been a while,

And all the while – I have missed You.

 

 

Day 71 of Boot Camp

Agh! Gents and ladies! Ladies and gents! I have gotten some things off of my shoulders today... which symbolizes that today was ACTUALLY a good day.

YAY :D Pay Pay!!~

Yes! I am so excited. Firstly, I got great news about my math final. I only get to study 6 chapters! Aaaand, I get to chose which chapters they are because I exceeded that amount! That's such an insanely awesome thing because I hated chapter 2 and 3. Those buggers really beat the crap out of my knowledge. Damn you fractions.

In Italian (secondly), I did my presentation!! I did well! Not to boast, but I believe I did better than all the others that presented today. I'm happy!!! I stammered a bit but you know what, everybody loved my presentation. They kept saying "Good job!" and I'd reply back with, "Grazie!" It was splendid :)

THIRDLY, once I was home and celebrating on my laptop (as I always do nowadays), around the evening time, I got a call from, whom I thought was, Chris (he always calls Blocked. I don't know why yet it gives me the hint that it is him). However, it was Grandma Deb Deb (Hi :D Thanks for still reading my blog!). She was giving me information about Mason. He sent a letter and stated pretty much exactly what he stated to me in the last letter I have received. He said that he would like to jump to WA first before heading down to OR.

So... You know how I was disappointed with Mason wanting to come up here first? Weeell, I'm glad now that he chose that because, once Aunty Amber popped on the phone, she let me know that Mason won't have any other clothing; just the ones on his back. He might only be here for... a couple of days - catch up with friends and possibly my family and with his mom and other relatives. Then, we'll head down to OR and TAKE OVER THE MANSION!!!!!! HELL YEA!!!!!! >:D

Don't worry. We won't crash it. Heck, if I find the vacuum cleaner, I'd vacuum that house every other day. And if I figure out how to work the dishwasher, I'd do the dishes. And if I knew how to do the laundry, I'd do the dang laundry!

I love that house. It is gorgeous.

So YEP!! I'm very, very, very happy we got things cleared up. Now they'll be sending back a "confirmation" letter saying that "Yes, you will be able to come up to WA and get what you need and Payton's mother will be buying your ticket; no problemo amigo."

:)

FOURTHLY (thought there wasn't going to be a fourthly, huh?), I watched a lot of Pewdiepie's videos today. I get SO JOYFUL when watching his videos!!! I'm even thinking about getting one of his shirts!!! They are AWESOME FANTABULOUS!!!

Give ol' Pewds a couple ah bucks to spend on his cute Italian girlfriend. :) <3

Psst, buy her an engagement ring!

:D

Anyways, amiche, I'm going to go and read my blog since I'm bored and not tired. Even though I'll be tired in the morning, as Pewdiepie would bellow,

 

"I DON'T CAAAAAAAAAAARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111"

 



Day 70 of Boot Camp

Right now I am sitting in the backroom taking care of my sick mother. She's going to the doctor tomorrow if this doesn't ease up (her anxiety) and check what is truly the matter with her. I don't know how long I'll be able to stay up but I'll find ways to keep myself awake. I know I have a presentation tomorrow, bros. But that's not until later on. I can be sleepy for math since I'm practically done with it (all I need to do now is study) so... it doesn't matter. My anxiety is just as bad as my mother's yet I don't puke. I just simply pass the Hell out for a couple of seconds. Maybe 10-15 at the most. It's scary... But yea, I don't want to automatically go to bed right this minute because I want to make sure my mom is okay. If I freak myself out, sending the chemicals in my brain to spazz out and have me on anxiety lock down, I'd be screwed. I wouldn't want my mom panicking anymore than she is. Hopefully she takes a few days off of work.

Today was fine, I guess. Before Jaylee left, we scared the CRAP out of ourselves with scary levels on LittleBIGPlanet. I miss LittleBIGPlanet. I need to get addicted to that game again. However, it's not as fun when you're playing alone. It gets boring; especially if people on LBP constantly post stupid crap... I want entertainment!!!

-sigh- Anyway... My cousin is awesome. Yesterday, while her and my mom and grandma visited Santa, she had grandma buy me and herself popcorn tins based on the epic stories of STAR WARS! She gave me the older version of Star Wars while she held onto the newer version (by that I mean on my tin were the older Star Wars characters and hers had the newer Star Wars characters). She LOVES Star Wars. I love Star Wars, also! That's why it was such a cool gift.

She's really brave too for a... nine year old? I think she's nine. Totally don't keep track with my family's age!! But... as I was saying... last night I pretty much had to sleep in the dark since she was sleeping with me in my bedroom. She can't sleep with a nightlight on... I had to push my phobia to the limit and turned off my nightlight so Jaylee could be happy. We kept on the upstairs light so I wouldn't be TOO paranoid yet I still got cruddy sleep.

Oh!!! And we didn't go to the marathon today, thank Jesus. I'm glad because first of all, I hardly got any sleep. Second of all, I didn't want my mom moving around and going places while she is sick. That would have put WAY too much strain on her. I figured this out after randomly waking up at 5:30 AM, realizing I was slightly awake and ready to go, but passed back out again since I was waiting for my parents to wake my ass up. Weeeeell, that never came... I woke up AGAIN randomly, checked the time, and noticed it was 6 o'clock! I freaked, thought for a second, then said to myself, "Ah, so they decided not to do this marathon. That's good." and fell, once more, back asleep.

Jaylee had me get up at 10:30 though. She really wanted to be with me before she had to leave. She said she had to go at 3:00 but... grandma got her at 11:30 because mom wasn't doing so hot (she still isn't). I was kind of sad because me and her were having a blasty blast on my PS3! Oh well, there'll be a next time. I sort of can't wait :)

To lift my spirits, I watched some more of Pewdie.

But OH MY GOD... Besides To The Moon, I have never cried SO MANY TIMES over a goddamn video game... AND I WASN'T EVEN PLAYING IT!!! Pewdie played this game called To The Moon. That was a little heart wrenching. He got A BIT emotional! However, I was the one crying that time. Not BAWLING, but I teared up a lot. Nevertheless, I must say, my favorite game-play so far has to be of The Walking Dead. No, no, it isn't like the show. I mean, some parts are similar, but it isn't really based on it. It was based on a comic book series. Maybe they are linked? I have no clue...

ANYWAY, as I was stating.... I have never... in my entire... year(?) of watching Pewdiepie have I ever seen him actually shed a tear. HE'S ALWAYS SO GOOFY!! The guy seems like that happiness is his only emotion!!! Don't get me wrong, that's beautiful. SOMEONE in this world has to have a good time through thick and thin. But my word... when we were getting to the end of The Walking Dead, the sorrow and the tears began showing. And I HATE IT when people cry!!!! Oh my God!!! It makes me WEEP! It was soooo hard to try and NOT cry because PEWDIE was crying!! It was the first time!! A new experience!! He's just so damn CUTE and to see his innocent looking face squeeze up into an expression of pure sadness made my heart crumble! I mean, I was crying over the video game too because... goddamn... it's SUCH a magnificent story and you get SOOO attached to the characters... but I was also bawling because Pewdie was bawling! I mean, right at the end, the VERY ENDING of The Walking Dead, he couldn't hold back his sobs and literally had to poke his head out of the camera's view in order to cry!! He was a wreck. And it made the moment even more devastating yet memerable.

I love you Pewdie. I honestly do. You are so great <3 You have touched my heart. Keep doin' what you're doin', man. Love ya, bro! -brofist-

Other than that... I watched a new episode of Family Guy where JOHNNY DEPP played a part in it! I waited until 9 o'clock like my life depended on it. Even though it was a short 20 seconds to hear him play Edward Scissorhands again, it was worth it. I LOVE YOU JOHNNY!!!! I LOVE YOU PEWDIE!!!!

I don't love you, Mason... Sorry, dude... Just... I can't-

SIKE!

I LOVE YOU HONEY!!!!!! -hugs and kisses from Washington State- :)

God, I miss him... I almost want to brainwash myself into thinking I'm not taken by him anymore so I'm not so paranoid. If I do that, I surely won't be going around acting like some skank! I'll just... think... "Oh, yea, another day... Nothing special. Don't have a boyfriend right now which is okay. I can handle being single. It's fine and dandy. I have my family." You know?

... Nah. That sounds a bit much...

I wish I could just... HIBERNATE. Hibernate until Dec/12 without it damaging my grade at all and I'd still be able to move on to quarter dos. But then I'd want to hibernate again while Mason's on the main base!!

Gah...

This is horrible :(

Pewdie? Johnny? Can you just... zap yourselves over to my place and hang out with me? Become my best friends? We could like... text and stuff and play LittleBIGPlanet together. It would be fun!

... :( If only that could really happen...

Day 69 of Boot Camp

My mom's sick again :( Her anxiety is getting bad for some reason. I hope I'm not a part of it... I mean, I am stressed out and sad and usually that stresses HER out and makes HER unhappy too so...

I just want her to feel better. I want all of us to feel better.

Today was laid back. I didn't go on IMVU because, after last nights encounter, I realized going on IMVU right now wouldn't be the smartest idea... Everyone and their LITERAL mama wants to be a jerk to me...

My mom and my cousin Jaylee went to go see Santa Claus while dad and I stayed home.

In other news, gosh... Y'know, you leave the house for one day and when you come back, there's a newborn pup and its mother running around!

Darn Sims...

;)

Sorry... Had to do a joke. It's been a few days since I've been silly.

Anyway... My cousin is spending the night here because tomorrow we are all getting up at 5 AM... Why in goodness sakes are we waking up so hellishly early??? Because I "committed" myself to being water-girl again during a HUGE marathon tomorrow. Jaylee wanted to be water-girl also so... she's tagging along. Mom will join us too. I don't know why she isn't running this marathon yet after tonight's episode of her anxiety, I'm glad she isn't.

Oh, and, by the way; my cousin keeps telling me to put in this post that she has "Funky Monkey" stuck in her head.

I think tonight is going to be a long one...

Not much to say... Still no phone call from Mason. I don't think I missed it but I won't keep my hopes up too high. I'm tired of them being tossed down to the ground with such force, it wilts my aching heart.

Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.

 

Day 68 of Boot Camp

I have learned another lesson. I shall never get excited over something that seems too good to be true. Why?? It's common sense! Something too good to be true is usually just that; it's TOO good to be true. So, it won't happen.

I got a letter from Mason today. Mason claimed he wanted to go to WA first and then around Xmas, we'll go down to OR. Well, here's the problem: uncle Troy and aunty Amber will be home by Dec/21st. This is based on memory and you know how horrid my memory is... With that being said, I'm concluding Mason wants to be down there around that time which means we won't have their house all to ourselves... I wonder if he got my letter stating I am able to stay with him in the house while the zii e famiglia are out of town...

Ubber disappointed if that's the case. I was hoping to have some quality time. I guess not.

But, I won't write back like a nagging girlfriend, saying I wish for it to be MY way and we head to OR first... It's about time I stop doing that. Goddamn my independence...

Oh well. Life's a bitch. Like I say; Mason is doing good. That's all that matters.

Lately, I have been playing the Sims 3. I took a break with Pewds and began building my society. I only have The Sims 3 Pets. I want all the others (except for the Katy Perry one. I don't have much of an interest in it. Yet if someone does buy it for me, cool - another add-on to the collection). It would be neat to have the entire series.

The Sims is a nice getaway. My parents are being annoying nowadays and so, I envelop myself in the Sims where nobody annoys me. Not even IMVU could do that. Nor Pewds (Sorry, Pewdie, but you do somewhat get on my nerves from time to time).

I think my parents are losing it. My mom is acting like a child and my father is acting like Captain Obvious (Stating everything that is obviously obvious...). I'm right along side them. I hardly smile anymore, I lost my spunk, I don't care for TV any longer and my family is getting me angry. Here's an example: My grandpa (though he was half-way drunk) and dad were pretty much making the life of a military wife/girlfriend humorous. I guess they were kidding... yet THAT kind of "humor" isn't in my vocabulary. Grandpa was cackling away and telling me how I should quit being so sad over it. Then dad adds in, "Yea... wow... the life of a military wife must be hard..." prior to giggling with grandpa. Grandma joined in somewhat but... her and mom have a strange "disorder" where they think everything is funny. Keeps them positive. Wish I had those kinds of genes. Instead, I got anger management, anxiety and depression. Lovely combination, right?

So... yea... Another day where I just wanted to shoot myself in the foot to ease the pain in my heart and in my brain. At least my parents aren't like what they used to be; acting as if sadness was a SIN! We had to be HAPPY around EVERYBODY and always be CHEERFUL and have a SMILE on our FACES!! We had to be ROBOTS!

... To tell you the truth, this still happens every once in a while...

I hate it when I have to shield my feelings. It's like if I do show them, others won't be able to handle it.

Sorry... I'm a human being. Humans have feelings and we tend to show them. It makes us feel better. It doesn't make us feel like we're foreign if we are showing fear over something even though someone else isn't afraid of it or anger when someone else isn't angry over the same thing.

Can't we all realize that there is such a thing called, "Feelings"? Can we cease the apprehension of forcing them to hide?

I'd appreciate it.

Cappadocia, Turkey

During a lovely sunrise in autumn, the view from the sky was wonderful at Urgup, Cappadocia, Turkey. The colors are going from green to red in a spectacular moonlike landscape.

Day 67 of Boot Camp

Gobble gobble!

21 days left.

Doesn't add up to 90? Go figure, I know that.

In 21 days, I'll be in San Diego. Since everything is in the morning, we'd be better off stationed in our hotel a day early so we won't miss a snip of the events.

Vabbene - in other news, Happy Thanksgiving. This Thanksgiving was entirely different. We went OUT to eat; at Black Angus. We had my grandparents, my two other grandmas, and my parents.

That's it.

We usually have a house full. About 20+. We'd always have Thanksgiving at our house but... everyone decided to be on their own I guess...

I don't know. But me and my cugino don't really appreciate the constant separation. As I was the door prop during my other cugino's birthday party, we texted one another all about it. Draven is a lot like me. He's a year younger than me yet he's incredibly wise and mature. You'd think a 17 year old would be a snob and only think about himself. Well, he's not which is awesome and which is why we are so close. <3

Anyway... I hope Christmas is better. I hope we have a great Christmas like we always do. I hope the family comes together finally and we all have a wonderful time opening presents and talking story. Or, I'll be having a wonderful time in OR with Mason and his family opening presents or talking story and hanging out. Hopefully, if I am in OR, the family will still get together when I'm not there.

Speaking of Christmas, people keep asking what I want. My answer is always, "I just want Mason." My grandma J chuckled, knowing that I would say that, and told me about my cousin Chris' (who's in the military) wife whom has a life-sized poster board picture of him and dresses him up each year for each holiday, etc. I said that sounded kind of depressing. She thought it was kind of silly.

... Is that what my life is going to be like? So lonely that I need a poster board of my Mason? Really? Seriously???? Is that how sorrowful my life is going to be????

I don't know if I want to live like that...

I'm starting to think twice on everything...

Day 66 of Boot Camp

Goddamn you, Marine commercials...

I'm tired of being reminded why my life sucks right now...

-sigh-

Hey guys. Had no math today nor any type of Italian test. I do have a project that I need to start and finish by Monday. It's a presentation. I have to present my parents on a PowerPoint... in Italian. I'll begin that tomorrow.

Today was okay. Boring and useless. But when I got home, it became calming. Though the rain slightly made it depressing, I happened to find something to do to let myself unwind; Pewdiepie videos.

That's right, folks! I took up the addiction of watching Pewdie again. I tossed IMVU aside for right now and decided it was time to look for some REAL entertainment. I love Pewds. He can have you happier than a camper in minutes. Sometimes, even in seconds! What a goober. I should send him an email, thanking him for taking out a part of his day just to entertain random people around the world. I'd let him know if it weren't for his videos, I don't think I'd know who to look for.

However, I did find another guy that I might start watching as well. His name is RaydiatorTV. He seems JUST as random and kooky as Pewdie. We'll see if he matches my satisfaction on the subject of good ol' entertainment.

In other news, dad met someone cool today. He tends to meet some awesome people even though his job doesn't sound like you'd be meeting amazing people left and right. Well, I'll have you know, my dad did meet Mr. Sir Mixalot a few times. No lie. Not to sound creepy, but he even knows where he lives. Pretty sweet, right? He even has a picture of him posing next to the rapper.

Today, he met a super genius named Dan Terry (DANTERRYINC.com *Hopefully that's the real link to his real organization*). He has the government and incredibly smart scientists coming to HIM. He's won patents multiple times and has invented unbelievable things. Dad even got a SAMPLE of one of those unbelievable inventions. Dan calls it "God water". He claims he spent 355 days on it, each day spending approximately 14 hours JUST to complete this chemical. Why did he do this? Scientists came to him and wondered what could POSSIBLY be stronger than bleach yet not be harmful for our skin. So, being the super genius that he is, he stayed dedicated to the subject until it was complete. The reason why he called it "God water"? The chemicals in the serum are 1,000 times STRONGER than bleach. It's sanitizer on steroids. It's even able to kill H.I.V.

Take that to Ripley. I think he'll place it in his Believe it or Not series in a heartbeat!

My dad seems to be a target for awesome things occurring for him when he's at his work. Shoot, he even found the end piece of pure titanium in the parking lot - possibly came from Russia! He also got to crate the LEGIT Harry Potter car (Y'know, the one Ron Weasley owned?). He's also getting a Warren Moon jersey (Seahawks version *Numeral uno!*). One of his co-workers bid on it on eBay and won. I guess this Moon dude was terribly famous; one of the best of the best football players. So, that's pretty sick!

And yes, my dad is in the crating business. My mom works on computers/software.

And I'LL become an author one day :D

Man... I really need to get to it, don't I? I need some motivation first... Feeling like smashed crud doesn't help any... Wish me luck.

 

Day 65 of Boot Camp

You all know about Hostess going out of business, right? It's a little strange to hear the good news about people in America SUPPOSEDLY eating healthier. However, I must say, I will miss eating those spongy heart-attack-in-a-wrap Hostess Twinkies. I will never forget the first high cholesterol-filled bite.

If you are wondering, I'm NOT feeling any better. I just... am... feeling a bit sarcastic this evening. I guess, no matter how bummed out I get, I'll always try to be humorous around others. Even though, technically, I'm not AROUND OTHERS while writing my posts yet... you people read them. Or at least skim them. Skimming counts.

Another bipolar day today. No more mail from Mason. I tried sending off a letter today however, I couldn't do it... I'm constantly throwing away letters. I'll write them, feel better that I wrote out my feelings, until tossing it because I don't want Mason to read it and feel more stressed. I mean, he's hardly getting any letters anyways because of the screw-ups in his PLT. If they continue being punished, he'll never get my letters suggesting he should call me or that I want to go to OR first.

The only plus of the day was finishing my math book and getting an A on the last test. I was pretty pumped! I won't lie; I was super proud of myself. I hate math! But I guess, for a change, math began liking me. So, in exchange, I decided to give it a try.

I didn't go on IMVU today! My mother suggested it. I told her how depressed I have been feeling lately and she let me know that IMVU DOES work me up. It's true. The idiots on there really get my pulse pulsating quickly. I thought I would be fine staying on there like I used to! Staying addicted and "having fun" in a different kind of way. I guess I need to slow it down; find another activity. I read over my book that I am thinking about sending to Mason during his time on his main base. I fixed a few things but that's about it for typing anymore of it. My aunt keeps questioning where "her" book is. I keep telling her that I'm out of it nowadays and can barely focus...

So I jump on IMVU and make my days worse...

Besides the point... Since we're on the subject of reading, I'll have you know that I tried reading over my blog - from the first post every posted to the latest post I have posted. That didn't work out so splendidly. The sorrow in those first couple of posts are strong... I kind of don't want to relive that right now. I need to take it easy. Seriously! I'm stressing over college, I'm stressing over Mason, I'm stressing over my future... God, it's horrible... I'm glad I got the Shingles done and over with. I'd be having them right about NOW.

Tomorrow I have no math. I have Italian, but my math teacher is taking a day off this week. Good for her. She deserves it. :)

And because it is Wednesday tomorrow, I hope mom will be able to answer the home phone while I'm at school. Even if I miss talking with Mason, at least we'll have our plans all figured out and ready to go. It would be a blessing though to hear his voice. I wonder if it got deeper? Will he start tearing up once hearing my voice? Will I start tearing up once hearing HIS? God I miss him...

Bleh... This is the worst year ever so far...

I need some definite help :(

WE, Mason and I, need some definite help.

Maybe I should start praying again.

Pheasant, Italy

This pheasant is proudly calling to mark its territory spotted with poppies, and seems to like to wear one of them as a mask—the right face at the right place for the right shot.

Day 64 of Boot Camp

My life is pretty much a living Hell right now... I don't even know how I'm not on medication. I am severely depressed... empty... and angry at the world.

Another horrendous day today. I have no hope for a better day tomorrow... I absolutely don't care what happens...

The weather matches my mood... Dark and dreary. It was hard to drive back and forth today. I had to use the last setting on my windshield wipers. That's pretty rare. I almost wanted to park on the side of the freeway and call mom, telling her to come get me. Yet that wouldn't have worked out so I toughened up and kept going.

Later on in the evening, the parents and I went to a little Asian restaurant/bar for my cousin's 21st birthday. I was the only not-over-21 person there... I was the door prop for half of the time. Then, finally, one of the owners decided I could go and join them. I wasn't completely at the bar, but I was close enough to it. I thanked her a bunch. I was able to eat and drink and talk with my family. After two hours, we went home.

Once home, mom checked the mail. I got another letter from Mason. He's not doing so well and I believe I missed his call... This letter was from Nov/11+ three more days I think. He said he'd call on Wednesday... Wednesday passed a long time ago. We never answer our home phones because all we get are annoying operators asking for our votes on things or donations. We don't want to deal with that crap! So, we wait for our cell phones to ring. If it were super important, they would call our cell phones. Nonetheless, I don't think Mason is able to contact folks through their cell phone. I think he has to contact a landline... which sucks... since we don't answer our landline phones... Now I'll be RUSHING to the phone each time it rings. I don't care who it is, I NEED to talk to Mason about our plans.

Another thing that got to me in the letter was, apparently, Mason got news that he will not be deployed because he's working on planes. I guess, one of the DI's or... whatever they're called, told those airplane-fixer-upper guys that they were a bunch of pussies since they won't get deployed.

I was seconds away from screaming...

And I don't mean in joy that my man will not be deployed.

I mean in full-blown rage...

I can't believe it. This is the reason why I HATE war, war affiliated crap; EVERYTHING like that! It's NEGATIVE! Mason doesn't need to be called that!! He is tougher than me! Tougher than ANYBODY he knows!! He's doing it for a cause, not JUST to get disciplined and built back up stronger. He should be called honorable. I'M not in the Marines or Army or... MILITARY! Call ME a pussy! A pansy ass. A loser who is weak and will ALWAYS be weak because I will NEVER come CLOSE to EVER becoming something like a soldier. I'm scared crapless towards that stuff. And I mean... CRAPLESS.

Shoot, I'm getting small anxiety attacks over Mason being gone and being treated like THAT; which I think is completely unnecessary... He doesn't deserve that crap. He should be looked up to. He should be THANKED. He's building planes/inspecting planes so the soldiers that are out in battle can have a safe vehicle to fly in. If they made that job available, then don't call them a goddamn pussy you stupid morons! However, for the OTHER platoon retards that keep screwing around, thinking boot camp is a goddamn game, THEY should be the ones getting insulted. This is the reason why Mason isn't doing so hot anymore; people keep SCREWIN' AROUND!! That's why THEY'RE in boot camp; because their parents want them to get disciplined and HOPEFULLY turned into civil human beings.

God... I wish upon those idiot jerk-offs some REAL pain without hurting the other platoon recruits... My man BETTER not get BEAT down anymore...

This'll be the only time I swear real bad on this blog but...

Don't. Fuck. With. Italian. Blood.

Period.

The military better be HAPPY that they're under the government because if I were able to just WALK UP IN THAT PLATOON and give that DI a piece of my mind, I'd do it in a heartbeat. No man, no woman, and no living THING will EVER look down upon my Mason. EVER. Unless they are brave enough to feel my wrath...

Mason... We all love you. Tell those douche-bags to go suck one. When you become an ultimate Marine, they'll feel intimidated that they ever even called you that stuff. I know I would.

Oryx, Namibia

Oryx captured in Namib-Naukluft National Park in Namibia just after sunset. They are heading through the dunes in search of food and water.

Day 63 of Boot Camp

Ugh, another bad day for me...

A family friend passed away last night... Apparently he had problems with his lungs... I've known him since I was way little. He was a friend of my mom's mom and dad. THEY'VE known each other since they were young too. He died at 11:00 PM. He was 74 years old.

R.I.P Bob a.k.a: The Bobcat Man. You will be missed. And I'll forever cherish the moment at the Lake Property when I was about 10 years old; telling me the "grueling story of this bobcat at the property". You scared the crap out of me every time you told that story. Yet it was fun. Tell Jo we all say Hi. We love you guys. Take care in Heaven.

If I didn't mention, Jo was another family friend who passed away unexpectedly several months ago. She had something wrong with HER lungs too; exactly the same thing as Bob. They weren't related.

Actually, to tell you something unbelievable, I had a feeling a while back that a friend of mine would soon pass away. This was a few days after I heard the news about my parent's running friend, Paul, passing away due to liver cancer. Coincidence? Or a spiritual gift?

I think spiritual.

I've had this "6th sense" type deal for a long time now. I sometimes FEEL things... or get a sense of something is about to happen. Back in the day, they used to come in as dreams. Now, they come in as thoughts.

Mom told me to keep track of my visions now. However, I'm not sure what a vision feels like until I notice it after the damage is done... It could be a dream, a daydream, or a simple thought crossing through my head.

I'll keep track though. I'm suspicious.

Other than that... I really miss Mason :( The pain of waiting for him to come home is just as agonizing as the pain when he had to leave.

Honestly... I'm actually paranoid of him LEAVING again... I don't know how I'll be. I literally get headaches from thinking about it. I just don't want it to HAPPEN. I'm tired of people leaving me! Why can't they just stick by my side? Is it really that hard????

...

At least he's doing this for a cause... Not to get away from me or his family. I mean, he kind of didn't want to do this. Yet... he had no money for college and he wanted to exceed in life... I guess I'm just angry that his life wasn't the greatest. I wish he had the money for college. He'd be safe at home and I wouldn't have to stress over wondering if the President of the United States will spontaneously cause another great war where EVERYONE is sent in to fight!

If Mason died...

...

I hope everyone's doing better than me. There doesn't need to be anymore suffering in the world right now.

See you all tomorrow.

Freshwater Mollusks

These are tentacles from freshwater mollusks know as bryozoa, similar to soft coral in the sea. They are aquatic colonial animals that grow on the rocks, branches, and leaves under the water.

Day 62 of Boot Camp

Today sucked... I don't even want to talk about it...

All I'll say is that it began at 8 in the morning as I walked with my mom's running group instead of doing the water stations and I don't know when it's going to end. The pain is pretty deep to the point where I don't really care what anyone has to say to me. I'll cry it out later. No big deal.

But before I depart, learn this. Don't walk away from me when I'm talking to you. I don't give a rats ass how old you are. If it isn't urgent, don't randomly dismiss yourself in the middle of my goddamn sentence. It's rude. Secondly, if you're going to be rude to me, understand that I will win the argument. Unless, you are similar to myself. However, if you were similar to me, you wouldn't be rude to me now would you?

That's all I have to say for now. Check out my IMVU blog. I posted up some crazy chats today.

P.S: Got a letter from Mason yesterday evening.

Peace.

Cyclists, India

I was traveling in Mumbai. I noticed that there are lots and lots of photo subjects. There is a place called Pali Hills, where people who migrated from Goa live. Their lifestyle is similar to the Goan people, and the architecture of this area is very unique. Some children were learning to ride a cycle on a busy street turn by turn.

Day 61 of Boot Camp

Asians.

I... FLIPPIN'... adore them...

They are so cute and creative!!!!

I want to hug ALL of you!!! One. At. A. Time.

Is that weird? ...

Hey, I'm just affectionate!!!! :) <3

Anyway, how's it goin', guys? So much to write in this one post!! Got to hurry before it turns 12 midnight...

Okay!!! Well... how about this? Have you ever sat in your car, in the middle of a practical forest, and listened to the birds chirping from the branches above? It's WONDERFUL! I have never experienced that before while sitting in my car in my parking spot at my college. It was beautiful :) I love the wild. I love animals... Wish it wasn't bothered by industrialization...

OH MY GOD!!!

Did I mention I slept in 20 after 8? Thank Jesus it wasn't 20 after 9! I'd be screwed... Usually I'm able to tell when it is 8:10. However, I haven't been getting good sleep lately so... I guess... I pass the Hell out and when it feels like I need to check the time, it's almost 8:30!!! Gah!!! Damn you brain!!! You're supposed to be a pro at this...

Matter of fact, since we're on the subject of "Did I mention", did I mention that I saw another friend a couple days ago? Her name is Skye and she is an ASIAN FRIEND!!! OH YEA!!!! SO ADORABLE!! She went to Kennedy with me. We were total amigas. Still are! I tugged on her arm since she was listening to music and she stopped, saw me, and we hugged with giant grins on our faces. We talked a little bit, hugged once again for a Goodbye, prior to parting and heading towards our classes.

ANOTHER "Did I mention" I remembered this afternoon was noticing that I haven't spent my $200 cash money won by getting 3rd place on an essay-based scholarship. The only way I'd be able to spend this money is by finding a small, uncommercialized book store. Well... since we don't live in an urban area, I can't really spend it :/ So... I felt kind of sad that I couldn't use my prize...

Ah well.

At least I won something in 3rd place :D

This was about... several months ago. Around... March of this year I think...? Super long time ago, I know...

Maybe they'll snatch the money back and use it for themselves?? I wouldn't mind... Give it some good use! :)

School was alright today. However, I got scorned at today by Johnathan and Jodi for drinking a NOS... I mean, it's Friday... I want to get jacked up. It's like a TRADITION! I had to inform them that I DON'T drink energy drinks aaaall the time. Only once every few months! But... what REALLY blew my mind was when I was heading out to the vending machine and Johnathan states he turned 18 today. I wished him a Happy Birthday and as I grabbed the handle to go outside, he tells his friend Dorrien (who's this French kid FROM France :o) that he might try out smoking...

Now... you see here... nobody talks about CIGARETTES these days so... I sort of guessed he was talking about MARIJUANA...

Really?

You're going to scorn at me for drinking an energy drink yet believe that smoking weed is completely cool?

...

These newer generations I have no hope for...

Anyway... As I was heading home (I see a LOT going from city to city...), an older gentlemen was crossing the intersection in front of us while we waited for the light to turn green. I don't know if this guy was DRUNK or just clumsy yet he TRIPS on himself, falls FLAT on his face, shatters his glasses, and I immediately almost have an anxiety attack... The lady in front of me put on her emergency blinkers, the biker to the right of me parked his motorcycle and the lady behind him began calling 9-1-1. They all helped out this man get to the other side. I stayed there a whole light cycle to see if they were enough help. After about 10 minutes, I drove off.

See? Why can't humanity be more like THAT? Giving a helping hand to people. It's not that hard!!!

Goodness. God bless those people who stayed and assisted him. I felt bad driving away yet everything was covered. They were enough help.

When I got home, mom, dad and I went to the at&t store to swap our phones. Dad got my phone, I got my mom's phone, and mom got the new iPhone5. NOW I have more space!!! :D

Oh, and check out this picture. I took it while driving to my college. This happened... two days ago...? Not sure but this fog was CREEPY weird and DENSE as Hell on my city. Take a look:

(And... as I went to my Gmail... I realized Google took off the picture background of my Forever Husband... D: Why couldn't they keep the backgrounds??? I forgot to hit More Information as they warned us for about a week...)

Day 60 of Boot Camp

Howdy hey!

Guess who got her classes for Winter Quarter?!

Some girl named Jessica Parkers... I don't know her but... CONGRATS!!!

Just kidding.

I GOT MY WINTER QUARTER CLASSES!

Yet I'm sure a Jessica out there in the world got her classes fixed up and ready to go as well. Congrats to that random Jessica.

SO! I was able to get into an English next quarter. It is ENG 092. If I were to pick 093, I would have acted like a foreigner who barely knows English. However, since my first language is Awesomenese, I'm able to skip that ENG and head to ENG 092.

As you can tell, I'm in a fabulous mood. I'm currently reading a book called The Ninja Handbook. I've read it before but I'm reading it again since it's insanely humerus. The sarcasm in that book brings out MY inner sarcasm.

Nevertheless, young grasshoppah... Becoming a ninja is no laughing mattah.

:)

Anywho, today was peachy. Italian was slightly annoying today but Math was BLISSFULLY amazing!! My teacher pushed me to the LAST chapter of my math book. THAT means she knows I'm doing well and would like to see me FACTUALLY (fact + actually = factually) move on to MATH 080. 080 is a slower paced class. I think I could do well in 097 HOWEVER... I really don't want to take that chance!!! Math and I aren't suitable friends... We're more like frienamies. We can't seem to make up our damn minds! So, having previous knowledge of not over stepping my boundaries, I'll be taking it easy. How about that?

Now, for something completely different...

I have decided to POSSIBLY make a blog based on IMVU chats... Recently, the chats I have been reading are either 1) Terribly bizarre, 2) Totally WRONG and 3) Completely idiotic. Maybe even if someone wants to be a jackass to me and I win the battle using my wise skills, I'll add that too. Yet I don't enjoy inducing negativity. I enjoy inducing entertainment and a couple of laughs.

I didn't get to go to therapy today because of the whole scheduling-my-classes deal. I didn't really need it anyway. I get angry here and there and maybe a bit lonely but soon enough, I'm better. I'm not CURED, but I'm better. I just tell myself, "You're alive. That's something to be happy about."

Speaking of quotes, here's a good one that I saw on some dude's profile: "Real eyes realize real lies."

FREAKIN'... amazing, right? I love it. Says the TRUTH about LIFE, man... <3

Alright! I'm out of here. I'll be working on that new blog :D Wish me luck!

P.S: Want to see something inspiring? Click here: https://www.youtube.com/embed/Pwe-pA6TaZk?rel=0

Lake Winnipeg, Canada

Two swimmers enjoy a preternatural calm on a summer's day on Lake Winnipeg.

Day 59 of Boot Camp

Officially we have a month to go beginning today.

I must have skipped a number because shouldn't 59 really be 60? Meh, I don't care... People understand what I'm trying to say whether it's bad grammar or total stupidity.

School was cool. Getting lost with Geometry now (SEE? SEE?!) and Italian was fun. Lately, Italian has been kind of exciting! Yet there is ONE... SMALL... PROBLEM.

Jodi.

She's showing her true colors now!

She's actually a HUGE, TREMENDOUSLY BEHEMOTH bragger. I mean, yes, she hasn't had a terrific upbringing BUT... still... C'mon, girl! You don't have to snicker and boast over every little tiny thing. I like her and all, since she respects me, but she's starting to get on my nerves :( I've never enjoyed the presence of an outgoing bragger. They make me want to forcibly smack them upside their head and shout, "Oh God! I'm sorry! I thought I saw pride crawling all over your face!!"

Just sayin'.

I was slightly angry all day. IMVU kind of helped. Nonetheless, there is ALWAYS ups and downs over the web. Just today, it got to me since I was already crabby.

My car drove great today! I love Enrico. My sweet, adorable Toyota. :D

It's strange though... When I was driving my mom's Xterra, hardly anyone wanted to get stupid with me on the road. However, in MY car, I see EVERYTHING. It's like my mom's car is a mask; shielding my eyes away from morons. I liked it, don't get me wrong, but I wasn't venting and sometimes I need to vent. Or be entertained. Either one works.

I guess since I was lugging around a 4X4, nobody decided to be brave and try something on me because I'd simply run them over like a trash can against a monster truck. I'm just happy I didn't get my mom's car in a wreck.

Well! That's all for now folks.

But before I go, here's a lesson for the not-so-wise and not-so-sensitive: Please don't take someones passion and turn it around into their regret.

That happened to me today while on IMVU talking to one of my newest friends!! Yet I shall NEVER... EVER... regret loving Johnny <3 Ever.

Day 58 of Boot Camp

My God! I have been busy as a bumblebee today! I've been on and off the phone and, this month, I am BOOKED for three days! I have a therapy appointment, I have a doctor's appointment and this afternoon, I scheduled for an appointment with my academic advisor so I can plan my next quarter classes. Sheesh! Brings back junior year and senior year in one large bundle.

Besides that, today was swell. I started on my Geometry and so far, it's not too shabby. However, I'm not going to swoon over it because I KNOW, once I get used to the easy parts, I'll be blown over by the tough parts that decide to POP OUT OF NOWHERE and GET'CHA in the behind! Sneaky little runts...

No mail from Mason, no more crazy dreams about Daniel Craig beating up thugs at a pizza parlor. Of course, I was on IMVU. I'm sure you readers are getting tired of me stating that since you can simply guess no problem. So I'll try not to round my day towards the laptop.

IN OTHER NEWS!!! I got my car baaaack!!! <3 I love my car. He is all spiffied up and brand-lookin' spankin' NEW. Yet I almost pulled away from the shop with the parking brake on... Jeez, I couldn't figure that out! I never use it... It's so old school!! I had to jump out of the car and ask for help from my mom. She smirked as if saying to herself, "These young kids and their fancy new gadgets; not knowing how to control a parking brake... My goodness! How silly."

I'll miss that orange pumpkin on wheels. I was, nonetheless, getting greedy with the power it held under its hood. I ran a STRAIGHT UP red light in downtown today... Good God... I know better than that!! And honestly, that was completely stupid for two reason... 1) I could have gotten into ANOTHER wreck and 2) I would have had to pay for a ticket MYSELF if there was a cop in the area... I don't even have a JOB!! But I'm sure my parents would MAKE me get one IF I did get a ticket.

I've learned my lesson...

Don't get greedy with power.

It'll be smooth sailing now that I got my car back instead of tapping the gas pedal in the Xterra and getting whiplash. I'll also not have to worry about gas. I think they filled my tank up for me...? So nice!! Love you guys!!

Oh yea... and I think I found the PERFECT name for my car...

How about this...

Enrico.

Suave, right? Just like my car ;)

Day 57 of Boot Camp

I didn't have school today! Whoo-hoo! I'm glad. Even though I got great sleep from staying up until 12 o'clock taking care of my sick mother, I was able to stay home and be a BUM once again (and continue taking care of my still slightly sick mother).

I got up at 8 AM (since I decided "What the heck?") and went straight on my laptop. Played on IMVU, talked with mom, watched movies... it was all fine and dandy :)

I got information on Family Day and Graduation. Family day is on Dec/13th and graduation is the day afterwards. We'll be getting up extremely early to participate in every activity and also because I don't want to miss a SINGLE GLIMPSE of Mason OR Hal. I wonder how Hal will turn out? Mason said he got sick... The PLT pretty much was beginning to get sick. However, Mason survived the virus!

LIKE A BAUS!

I have a Word Document covering every detail of each event. I am sending a letter to Mason tomorrow asking if he'd rather go straight to OR or WA, THEN to OR. I'm sure he'd love to do either one as long as we're together. I plan to go straight to OR with him.

They say, right after the graduation, he is able to go home with us. Wouldn't that be spectacular? Snuggle my honey all the way to OR. Oh!! I wouldn't let go!! We'd be like white on rice to each other!

Hehe, so that's about all I have to say for today.

OH!

I forgot to tell you an INCREDIBLE dream I had two nights back. I don't remember every single thing but I know enough to entertain you readers :D Here we go...:

JAMES BOND DREAM:

Around the beginning, I do remember seeing Daniel Craig standing outside a pizza parlor waiting for me to join him inside. It was night out, we were occupied on a small street or alleyway, and their were people everywhere; inside the parlor and out. Once examining his dazzling look (a tuxedo), my brain said, "He's JAMES BOND! What is he doing here?" Well, I soon found out...

After exiting the pizza parlor, Bond saw a couple of thugs hanging out at the joint. This is where the ACTION begins!!

Out of NOWHERE, Bond starts beating the CRAP out of these guys! I forgot if they made a move or something, but obviously they deserved it.

Apparently, James Bond has super human strength in my dreams... He was picking up those young punks as if they were RAG DOLLS! After the chaos was through, I was stunned. I was sitting in a chair, gaping at Bond in horror! He nonchalantly walked up to me, saw that I was startled, and hugged me. "I'm sorry..." he whispered in my ear. "It's okay..." I whispered back and while he pulled away (Yes, you guessed it!), I kissed him on the lips. I got to kiss him two times until he stood up and walked off.

But once he stood and I was able to look around, we were suddenly in my house! In the front room.

Momentarily, a man was standing outside of my front door. Dad went to open it and once he did, I joined. The man outside looked to be a Hispanic general. He held a puppy (chocolate colored Lab) and candy. Guess who it was for...

Me.

Never seen this man in my life but I took the generous offerings. We soon found ourselves standing in the driveway. I was a few feet away while dad talked with the general.

All of a sudden, the general states, "Ah! Here are some of my men now..." Dad, like a gentlemen, goes over to the white van that parks in front of our house. Strangely enough, these people were wearing MASKS of former presidents! Now I knew something was wrong...

But it was too late...

The driver pulled out a gun and shot and killed my father. I screamed so hard and cried so much, I'm surprised I didn't scream or cry in real life.

I chased after the van a little ways until stopping, turning to find the general, yet he was long gone. I collapsed in a heap of misery. The last thing I shouted was, "JAAAAAAAAAAAAAMES BOOOOOOOOOOOND!!!!!!" I saw him inside the house, running outside to collapse beside me; holding onto my shaking body to comfort me. I shrieked and I wailed... until the dream ended.

HOW ABOUT THAT?! Jesus, was it exciting!! I mean, I hated the ending, but hanging out with 007 I THOUGHT was super cool.

I wonder if he knew I was Batgirl and wanted my assistance? ;)

Day 56 of Boot Camp

Jesus!! I almost forgot to write in my blog!!

I'm getting carried away with IMVU nowadays and my mom is sick so I'm catering to her also. Dad's asleep, which is fine, because I can stay up as long as possible (I love my youth :D)

Anyway, today was another chill day. I was struck by depression earlier yet that is happily done and over with. I met some new chaps on IMVU today who made me feel worthy and I'm glad to say... they have been entered into my Friends List :) One of them even looks like Daniel!!

Ironically, earlier today, I found a middle school year book. I think it was 7th grade...? Not positive. I wasn't completely worried about what year it was; more or less seeing my buddy.

That's right. Daniel. I got to see his beaming face.

It's been a looong time since I got to see him. Another piece to the aching puzzle has been found and happily placed in its spot. He even wrote in my year book. I don't remember what it said but... shoot... him writing in my year book was like traveling around the world in 80 days... I was up in Cloud 9. I met Heaven that day.

I wonder where my 8th grade year book is? Probably stashed in the attic. We cleaned up my room today and are stacking boxes full of my Kennedy school stuff up there. Later, we'll pack up some other things that are not needing to be in my room.

Other than that... HAPPY VETS DAY!!!!

God... It's kind of weird... You know, when Mason is finished working as a Marine, he'll be called a veteran... That's so... NEW to me. All of this military stuff is so much DEEPER now that I have a close loved one dealing with it. I kind of didn't want that to happen, you know? I have an issue with acceptance...

I hope everyone's days are beautiful. I hope everyone is getting along. And I hope and pray that all the young and old ladies out there in the world, dealing with a loved one who's in the military, to stay safe and keep their heads up high for the future to come. I know it's tough. I want to give up too. But just remember; once this is over, you'll have a Happy Ever After ending.